Tuesday, July 8

All Bark, No Bite

It started out like any drinking night. Clean the flat, buy booze, welcome people and socialise. We played drinking games; Ring of Fire (called Kings Cup or Circle of Death elsewhere in the world). I couldn’t recall all the rules, so I had to ad lib. We drew cards, we got drunk, then I lost. I drunk a mug full of soju, wine, whiskey and coke as the penalty for losing. After that I remember nothing.

I woke up in the morning, my teeth felt strange. I got up, and winced at the pain in my knee. I hobbled to the bathroom mirror and opened my mouth. A gap tooth monster started back at me. My central incisor was half gone, and the other one chipped. My mouth was bloody and my lip swollen.  I couldn’t remember a thing. I Skyped my parents and swore profusely about my lack of teeth.

When my flat mate woke up I ran to him and asked what happen. He didn’t know. Apparently I got into a fight. I could believe that, I’d been in fights before, but my wounds didn’t add up. I concluded that I must have face planted the payment and destroyed my teeth.

I arranged a dentist appointment for that afternoon. I arrived and chatted with the friendly dentist and technician. I was still partially drunk, so was extremely talkative and had the ladies cooing. 2 hours later and $200 poorer my teeth were fixed, and looked fantastic. Who knew that cosmetic dentistry was so easy and cheap?

I still feel slightly sentimental at the loss of my own beautiful teeth, but I can’t turn back time and get them back. So I might as well get on with life.

Maybe next time I won’t drink as much.
Maybe next time I won’t drink on an empty stomach.
Maybe next time I won’t lose Ring of Fire.